That’s the little girl I’m trying to save. She’s five years old and full of joy. She likes to skip, jump rope, swing high and lean back as far as she can in the seat. She loves balloons and bubbles because they reach the sky and make the angels smile. She chases fireflies, sees shapes in the clouds, sings Jesus Loves Me, plays with dandelions, draws clown faces in the dirt with a stick, and wishes on the first star she sees. She chooses fruit over candy every time. My greatest mission in life is to make sure she is healthy and happy. She deserves that.
As I’m on this journey to overcome junk food addiction and transition to a whole-food, plant-based lifestyle I think about why I’m doing it. I have to keep my WHY in front of me at all times or I will be tempted to slip back to unhealthy eating habits that will destroy my body. The more whys I gather up, the stronger my conviction gets. My whys are becoming much more powerful than my why nots.
Why am I doing this? I want to be around to see my grandchildren grow up and have the energy to do active things with them like go to the park, fly kites, swim, travel… I want to be a positive role model for my family, friends, and community by being a living example that you can overcome what may seem like insurmountable obstacles to live your best life. I want to save my inner child.
Last night I ran across this picture of myself at age four or five. I think this was when I was still innocent. When I didn’t yet know about the danger and pain that awaited me in my world.
This is how I see my inner child. A carefree, imaginative, strong, beautiful spirit that helped guide me to the courageous woman I have become.
I want to protect my inner child. I tear up when I think about all that child went through and survived just so I could stuff her with junk food and make her fat and sick. She loved fruit. My mother told me that she would win bets with people by telling them I would choose fruit over chocolate or any type of candy. She said I chose fruit because there was more of it. I guess a banana was bigger than a Hershey bar in my mind or maybe I just had the instinct of what was healthy. That instinct is still there, I just have to listen to it.
I think I will take this picture, put it beside pictures of my grandchildren, and place it where I will see it every day, maybe put a copy on my vision board and the fridge too. That should help keep me on track!
Why do you care about your health? What’s your why? What is your inner child like? Is she healthy and happy? She deserves the best life has to give and only YOU have the power to give it to her.